Prayerfully Busy

I'm a busy person.  I use to believe my busyness was essential, important and useful.  Now, I'm not so sure about some of it.  I rush around doing things, not really realizing that I'm...well, rushing!  My first realization of this was a couple of years ago when I was flying through Walmart with my buggy, coming around a corner and almost giving grown men (tall manly men) coronaries as I screeched successfully to a stop before running them over.  (This happened twice in one Walmart trip.)  The looks on their scared faces have been etched in my mind.  Why am I always in a hurry?  Poor planning?  Wanting to finish the task?
I know I'm a goal oriented, task mastered, detail determined, my way or no way kind of a gal!  Apart from the Holy Spirit, I'd definitely be a "stepping on whomever to get that goal accomplished" kind of person.  Praise God for His transformation.  But I still struggle with it.  Staying in God's Word always brings me back to the place of dependence on Him and putting others before myself.  God knows it's been a process and He has definitely given me patience with others and myself as He works this out in me.

And the reason for the post?  Well, I've been reading Ezekiel and I found something that spoke to me about this very thing.  I'm sure it's not exactly the meaning of the passage but it was a great reminder for me!  Ezekiel 1:14, "And the living beings ran to and from like bolts of lightning."  So, when I read that of course my first thought was, "Wow!  That reminds me of me!  (And those men's faces came to my mind!)  As I continued reading the passage about these figures that Ezekiel says resemble four living beings and John MacArthur says were probably angels, most likely cherubs, I was struck with my need of awareness of my own actions.   Backing up in verse 12, it says, "And each went straight forward; wherever the spirit was about to go, they would go, without turning as they went."  And on down in verse 20, "Wherever the spirit was about to go, they would go in that direction."  John Mac says the "spirit" in these passages is the "divine impulse by which God moved them to do His will."

So how do I move with the "divine impulse"?  By reading the Word, learning it and living it.  By getting on my knees daily and asking God to move me as He wills.  By asking the Holy Spirit to live through me and guide me moment by moment.  Yes, I want my busyness to be essential, important and useful.  But it must be bathed in humble prayer and seeking God with all my heart.  Only then will I be more watchful, caring,  and resting in the results.   I want to go "straight forward", to go "wherever the spirit was about to go...without turning as" I go.  I want to go in the direction only as the spirit goes, God's divine impulse!

And I'm very thankful that I was not the cause of casualties at Walmart.  I am learning and thankfully not always is it a "learning the hard way".