As I walked today and tried to pray, many thoughts kept
bombarding my brain. It’s truly
warfare to try to pray, but it’s a worthy battle to fight. Therefore, my walk was full of both
conversation with my Father and unruly, scattered thoughts about spiritual
life. (Yes, the Enemy doesn’t care
what you think about as long as you are not praying.)
One of those bombarded thoughts had to do with our
works. Sometimes it’s hard to know
the difference between what God is doing in us and what we contrive on our
own. I constantly fight moving
forward with ideas to implement God’s word. I call it “fight” because many times this is my movement and
not His. I must wait for Him to
show me when and how to move. One
of those distinct times in my life was when I began teaching four and
fives. The process that was
involved in getting me to that place took about five years and I didn’t even
realize it was going on until after it happened. It’s a long story and I won’t go into it here, for that is
not the reason for this post, but what I will say is that God does not need any
help to get us where He wants us to be.
We just need to be faithful and committed where we are right now until
He does the moving.
I’ve been teaching this age children now for many years and
I will say that I am just as excited and passionate about this job as I was in
the beginning. And this coming
from a person who had said, “I will never teach any child under first grade.” Our lives must always be bowed down and
open to the whatevers God has to bestow on us. And we should know that it will be “immeasurably more than
we ask or think.” Take it from me,
that has been proven in my walk with Jesus, time and time again!!
Well, back to the subject of today’s post: Recently, I had someone say something
that cast an inferior slur on this privilege with which I’ve been blessed. It wasn’t malicious but it was like
“just” teaching fours and fives was Christian Easy Street. I’ve had many roadblocks in my
walk as a believer and many through the years of teaching these precious little
ones. This is just one more roadblock, I know, but since it’s recent, it still rather nags on me.
It was nagging today and I thought, “do I need to pray to be
used of God another way?” Do I
need to teach older people? As I
thought on this, I realized that this is the Enemy working my most horrid sin
to my disadvantage: PRIDE. For
what reason do I need to even think I need to move when God has not even hinted
at this? Is it for
recognition? I fear that’s it
exactly. And I know for a fact, that is NOT God!
The children love me for a very short time. In fact, a teacher of older children
told me once that by the time she gets my group, I am merely a fuzzy
memory!! HA!! She said that years ago and she was
absolutely right! For many of
them, it’s not even “fuzzy”. It’s
completely gone! But what does
that matter. What is my
motive? I want to be used to help
equip these precious ones with a foundation that will be built on for many
years and aid them in their seeking God.
So what does it matter if they ever remember
me. Not one whit! God is my reason for everything I
do. He has told us that it is He
“that works in you to will and to act according to His good purpose.”
(Philippians 2:13) And 1
Peter 1:4 says that we have “an inheritance that can never perish, spoil, or
fade”. And I’ll add “or be
fuzzy”.
“Only one life; ‘twill soon will be past. Only what’s done for Christ will
last.” C. T. Studd
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